O, let me not be mad, not mad, sweet heaven! Keep me in temper; I would not be mad! --King Lear, 1:5
It is officially the season for the crazies, which must be why my birthday is at the end of January, so that I can have a party right in the middle of the dreary days. It was a sweet birthday too, with chocolate cake, wonderful gifts and five of the loveliest people I know. The cards came and filled my house-- from grandma, and my parents, and Sarah, and my visiting teachers, and Mira--all saying that they love me. I cried when I blew out my candles. Love is strange, and powerful, and filled with forgiveness.
Like always, I am self destructing in Winter. Remember that high and mighty post about nutrition. Confession: I ate half a box of Cheezits while watching The Biggest Loser, then I ate a bunch of chocolate covered cinnamon bears. Oh, and I didn't do any running this week, and a shotty attempt last week, and I am not swimming at all. I haven't read to my kids in two weeks. I forget to drink water. I say lip-service prayers.
The recession has finally caught up to Charles' work (we knew it would eventually) so that worry has set in, as well as pure bafflement over how expensive our lives are. This has given urgency to the decisions I make about my career. I am trying to balance the things that will give me the most joy and satisfaction with the things that will be the most positive for my family. Whatever shall we do? I am talking to lots of people about options...and am liking many.
Some great things happened this month.
1. The University has added an MFA in creative writing, which means that instead of getting an MA I will get an MFA. This is great news because an MFA is more accurate to what I am actually doing and sounds a lot better since I'm a creative writer.
2. Obama is in! Yes!
3. Em D. and I spent an afternoon in the Salt Lake Library yak yak yaking about writing.
4. I'm going to see Melanie Rae Thon tonight.
5. I'm married to Charles (great for me, curse for him).
6. Jimmy and Rachel got a baby girl (amazing, surprising, astonishing, wonderful).
7. And it is January, and I am thirty-three.
8. And Spring always comes.
9. And Pam's pool will be waiting.
5 comments:
"I fear I am not in my perfect mind." Yes, that describes January. Looking forward to celebrating your being alive in the world!
This is one of my favorite posts.
1. Because I fall off the nutrition bandwagon frequently and like to hear others do, too.
2. Jim & Rachel have a baby!!
3. I'm glad you get to have a better-suited degree.
If I'm being really honest, though, it's mostly because I am glad you ate a half box of Cheezits. :)
You are delightful. And happy birthday! And thanks for bringing choc-covered cinnamon bears to class so that we could all spike our blood sugar with you. They were delish.
I don't need to blog today because you said it all for me. Thank you. Love you.
Ouch! You are only 33! I always thought we had a larger age gap. You always were more mature than me! You were always so cool to me (and still are of course). But you were always my rag doll, right? Happy Birthday! We missed you and Pam at the shower!
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